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Do you want to grow elephantine endives? Gargantuan green beans? Colossal cauliflower?

The secret, as any good gardener knows, is in the fertilizer, and if you want rhinoceros-sized rhubarb, maybe you should add a little rhinoceros-sourced manure.

Every year, the Woodland Park Zoo collects the manure from their “non-primate herbivores”, compost it and sell it to local gardeners who are interested in adding a little zoological zip to their harvest. However, there are more people interested in the Fecal Fest than there is feces to go around, apparently, so if you want some of the dark matter, you have until March 1st to enter the lottery.

Here’s all the info, straight from the equine’s mouth:

WHAT:
Calling all green thumbs: Fecal Fest is back! Woodland Park Zoo’s annual Spring Fecal Fest officially starts February 1, which is when garden enthusiasts can enter online to win the chance to purchase the super-poopular Zoo Doo and Bedspread. Dr. Doo, aka the “Princess of Poo,” the “GM of BM” or the “Captain of Caca,” has been piling Zoo Doo for the last several months and the exotic, highly coveted compost and Bedspread are ready for spring planting.

The sweet, aromatic Zoo Doo is composed of species feces contributed by a variety of the zoo’s non-primate herbivores, such as rhinos, hippos, giraffes, mountain goats, tapirs and more; it’s perfect for growing veggies and annuals. Bedspread contains the same species feces and is made from woodchip and wood shavings bedding; the premium composted mulch is ideal for placement on top of garden beds to suppress weeds while gradually fertilizing plants. Compost saves water and reduces the need for fertilizers and pesticides.

The driving force behind the Zoo Doo program is the zoo’s commitment to sustainability and conservation. By turning animal “waste” into gardening gold, the zoo creates a valuable renewable resource – converting 625 tons of animal manure into Zoo Doo every year! This practice generates less waste that goes into public sewage system, benefitting the planet, the zoo and the community.

Zoo Doo is available by the gallon starting at 5 gallons up to a maximum of 100 gallons or by the truck load, and Bedspread by the truck load only.

HOW:   
Starting February 1 through March 1, enter online to win the chance to purchase Zoo Doo or Bedspread. To enter, fill out the online form at zoo.org/fecalfest. Only one entry per person is eligible for each drawing.

Entries will be randomly selected according to supply and demand. Dr. Doo will contact the lucky drawn entries only. Pick-up dates will begin
March 21–March 29. Phone and mail orders can’t be accepted.

WHEN:    
Online entries accepted: February 1–March 1
Pick-up dates take place: March 21–March 29

COST:
Only cash or checks will be accepted—no debit or credit cards.

Zoo Doo: 5 gallons $6; 10 gallons $12; 32 gallons $24; 55 gallons $36; 100 gallons $58. Pick-up truck: 6×3 bed $55; 6×4 bed $80; 8×4 bed $90. Winners can purchase one full truckload per person. 2 gallon and pint-sized buckets are available at the ZooStores for $25 and $6.95.

Bedspread by the truckload: 6×3 bed $45; 6×4 bed $55; 8×4 bed $65. Winners can purchase up to two full truckloads per person.

INFO:              
Visit zoo.org/fecalfest for information or call 206.625.POOP (7667).

Winter zoo hours through April 30: 9:30 a.m. to 4:00 p.m. daily. For more information or to become a zoo member, visit www.zoo.org or call 206.548.2500.